Vaccines through the eyes of a conspiracy theorist
Warning to all anti-vaxxers: you have just entered the anti anti-vaxxers section. Continue at your peril!
If you’re an anti-vaxxer reaching this website has probably stretched your technical ability to the limits. Should you also be of a nervous disposition, or even the slightest bit sensitive, now is the time to continue counting your marbles, or some other equally challenging task.
Getting inside the mind of anti-vaxxers
The covid virus is the conspiracy theorists dream come true. Anti-vaxxers are literally wetting themselves over this most recent gift from the gods.
The fact that most of the anti-vax brigade have already lost their minds, doesn’t make this task any easier. Should the gods look down upon us favourably and we do find it, once inside, the most abundant feature will undoubtedly be empty space
Anyone expecting to find anything resembling grey matter is liable to be severely disappointed. The best you can hope for is something not unlike a half eaten bowl of rainbow coloured spaghetti.
A common feature amongst anti -vaxxers is the absence of any critical thinking skills, but let's take a closer look behind their twisted logic. Most often, it is their source of information hat causes us to question their sanity.
The sanity of people believing the covid conspiracy
Invariably, the main cause of this pseudo dementia is from people with ulterior motives. Typically: their sources of information are websites, all of which need to attract visitors to whom they can sell their wares and or display adverts.
The golden rule in the news industry is that adversity beats good news. When it comes to clickbait, stories of doom and gloom grab more attention than good news. So already we’re beginning to see method in the madness.
By and large, the peddlers of such damaging falsehoods are totally void of original thinking. Quite often they’ll take well meaning and scientific reports and distort them beyond recognition. Alternatively: they’ll quote a scientific report, either not peer reviewed, or disproven by 99.99% of the scientific world.
Another tool in their box of blunt instruments is to only quote part of the story, while totally ignoring the remaining facts, which would inconveniently turn their claims upside down.
As those opposed to the covid vaccine, covid conspiracy theorists, and covid deniers continue to demonstrate, not all idiots are created equal. Another thing these groups have so eloquently, yet unknowingly highlighted, is the failings of our education system. The fact that these lunatics continue to crawl from the swamp, itself a rather large evolutionary step forward, indicates our standards of education are not as they should be.
Before I go any further: if you belong to one of the aforementioned groups, congratulations for making it this far down the page. It may have taken you a few hours, and you may have needed someone to explain the long words, but hang in there and before you know it you’ll be reading joined up writing.
Please understand my dilemma: as I am trying to reduce the vocabulary gained from a university education to the level which people who normally converse in grunts and squeals will understand.
Admittedly: calling you idiots was a little unfair… to common or garden idiots everywhere. Maybe we should create a new word for your special kind of stupid, say for instance “vaxiots”
Stupidity in itself isn’t a crime, but while they insist on being a carrier for any number of deadly or debilitating diseases, we have to consider keeping them out of harm's way, for their protection and that of others.
So there we have a brief overview of the thinking behind our typical anti-vaxxer. They’re obviously not the sharpest tools in the box, but that’s not to say we should abandon them.
While it could be argued that the offer of a vaccine prior to being exposed to a deadly virus may help them see the error of their ways, we have to remember we’re dealing with people with single digit IQs. Fronting them with such a monumental choice would be like giving a Rubik’s cube to a drunken chimpanzee.